The trouble with oranges

Let me preface this blog latest post with I LOVE MY NEW JOB. In many ways it's the "same church, different pew" but in other ways it's very VERY different. Mostly in good ways, but there are downsides as well.

You know that whole "customer service oriented" patient care trend sweeping the nation? (thanks Medicare and HCAHPS or however the fuck you spell it) Well, I am very pro patient and I go out of my way to be kind and considerate and provide excellent care but this new hospital I'm at? Uses that philosophy of mine and takes it to the extreme.  For example: Our patients are offered iPads to borrow during hourly comfort rounding.  And we have thick, white terry robes for them to wear while ambulating in the halls.  My patients are treated like they are in a luxury hotel.  Which honestly, in most cases makes me feel really happy because I like seeing them comfortable and feel well taken care of. The problem is for some patients, this perpetuates an entitlement mentality and the view that their nurses and doctors are their servants, who are supposed to do their bidding.  The next issue is, while I love providing patient care and exceeding their expectations.. those "expectations" become higher and higher and before you know it, patients tend to lose sight of the fact that they are in the hospital for MEDICAL TREATMENT.

Cue the orange incident.

One of my elderly patients whom the aid and I have been bending over backwards to make happy ALL DAY hit the call bell and I went in.  He held up his orange and said "do you see this?" I said "yes, it's an orange" He said, "I called and told them to cut up the orange for me into slices.  This is what I got.  Now do you understand why I get so frustrated."   Here's what I WANTED to say:

And here is what I DID say, "You must have been disappointed to see that on your tray. I apologize for the miscommunication. I will personally call the diet office and make sure they are aware of this request for next time.  Would you like me to slice it up for you now?"

Patient: "No.. no my appetite is ruined.  Can you put it into the refrigerator for later?" My response "Absolutely!" And I whisked it away to the patient refrigerator. (and said "fucker" under my breath)

A positive? Free espresso and cappuccinos whenever we want for the nursing staff!!  Hm.  How about that. The scanners (for patient ID bands and meds) actually WORK (unlike my other hospital), we have all the latest and greatest state of the art medical equipment and an in house fitness area with our own personal trainer, and what do I focus on? Free coffee.

Maybe I'm not all that different from the codger with the orange after all.  LOL