We've ALL got problems. Some of them are just more visible than others. Some people wear their eating issues on their ass, other people meet society's conventions of "normal" yet live in absolute filth. Some people live with domestic abuse, still others live a life of misery because they are all alone. Whether it's how a person looks, how they view food, how they see the world or how others see them.. NO ONE is in any place where they can look at a morbidly obese patient, for example, and say "that's disgusting, how could anyone let themselves get like that?!" Make no mistake, nobody LETS it happen. 600 lbs doesn't come from the occasional slip up at the McDonald's drive through. 600lbs comes from trying to fill a void, self loathing for doing so and lather, rinse, repeat. A thyroid condition or a crappy metabolism on top of an overeating disorder could become a perfect storm for morbid obesity.
In health care, a very large person can be extremely difficult to care for, and I can bet you that the biases people have against the obese show to the bariatric patient. They tend to be very withdrawn and make less eye contact than most other patients. They are embarrassed as fuck to be the size they are and totally dependent on staff that give subtle or not so subtle cues that they are disgusted by them by the looks on their faces when they have to "lift that roll" to apply nystatin powder or that they avoid them because they are afraid they will have to assemble a crew of people to get the patient cleaned up.
I will confess something here. I truly believe that people won't like me as much if I don't keep up with my appearance. Take away the makeup and the hair and I'm as awkward as a 13 year old. People perceive that looking "pulled together" all the time makes me seem like a person who has it all together. In actuality, I envy women who have the freedom to just leave the house with a bare face without so much as a glance in the mirror. I would be HORRIFIED if anyone saw me how I look when I first roll out of bed. (well except my family, I'm not that crazy lol) I will also confess that the first 2 years I was married I made it a point to wake up before my husband so I could put makeup on before he saw me. I suppose all of that could be considered vanity but I think truth of the matter is that it's an insecurity. What this means is, in actuality, I'm not that different from a 600 lb person in that, I am very affected internally by how others perceive me. Which just proves we are all way more alike than any of us realize- and that's kind of nice because that means we aren't really ever alone. And why it's shitty to look down on anyone who has a problem because we ALL have them.
Look at this blog (hell, look at the name of the blog).. you know why I put my actual picture on it? Because I don't think anyone would give a rat's ass about what I have to say unless they see it's coming from someone "pretty".
I am getting older (only 2 more years to the big 4-0!) and I am seeing the wrinkles start and noticing things start to go south here and there. I can only hope that when I'm elderly and the conventional beauty of youth has completely faded from my face that I finally get to feel the freedom that comes with not giving a shit what anyone thinks about me, and the wisdom to know that what I say carries enough meaning that it doesn't matter whether or not it came from someone attractive. But until then? Bring on the lip gloss.
